“Before ya’ her’ it from someone else, let mah tell ya’. Since ya’ ak’sed and all.”
His mouth gaped at me as he sat, his jeans soaked from the monsoon of rain that had pounded overhead for the past eight. He nodded his head in a sleeplike state.
“Ya’ know, old Jasp, sometimes I think yer just plain stupid. Ya’ know that, Jasp?”
He kept nodding his head. I hated that. When your friend is all soaked and so dumb he can only nod his head. I felt bad for him, honestly. I mean, Jasper had been like a brother to me or something. I had been his guardian and all since his parents died three years ago.
I looked at him, but I couldn’t do it for long. He had this curved lip that faced the ground and his mouth hung open like he was sped. He was though. I mean “special ed” and all. Poor old Jasper couldn’t even understand nothin’ or say nothin’. It was a shame, really. At least he had me to tell him stories. It was good he had me. Swear to God.
I was the only reason he had made it this far. I mean, we lived under a bridge, but home is home. Most of the time it was cold as demons. That was now. We were both wrapped up with trash and all, just to stay warm. It helped, but the blowing air full of water didn’t help. If I didn’t have Jasper, I swear I would’ve jumped off a bridge. Really.
I looked away and to the other side of the bridge. I had to. I couldn’t take looking at him. My back rested against the wet stone. My legs, scrunched to my chest and Jasper rocking back and forth, staring at me. It killed me.
I tapped him on the shoulder and he moaned softly. I couldn’t look at him though.
“It was a dream. The thing I’ve been meanin’ ah tell ya’. I had a dream bout’ the same ocean from the docks. Ya’ know, back when yer ma’ used to take ya’ out and letcha ya’ sit there and hear the calm breeze. That’s how we met ya’ know. Out at the good ole’ docks.”
I stopped and looked up at the bridge above us. Water streaming down from the sides. The skies were gray and dark and all. It was depressing. Cold and depressing.
“The docks. Yeah, I used to work on them ships and wait hour after hour until I could get off. I’d come by and see you just watchin’ tha’ ocean—in your crippled body.”
“Mhmm,” Jasper moaned.
“Ya” miss that ocean don’t ya’?”
Nothing.
“I miss it too, ya’ know. Just yer parents had to go die and leave ya’ wit’ me. Ya’ know ya’ better be thankful ya’ had me. I tell ya’ all the time. Ya’ better be thankful.”
I still couldn’t look at him.
The rain hit the ground and made a lake. It filled in the area that skaters would come and dive into. They were good kids. They always stopped by and gave us something to eat. Something to fill our empty stomachs.
“Ya’ know, Jasp, if I didn’t have ya’I’d have food, and if ya’ didn’t have me, ya’ wouldn’t have life.”
I looked at him, finally. His lip out and his mouth gaping wide. His brown eyes and wet face. The brown hair protrudes far over the face. Thank God it was, because if I had seen his eyes I would’ve cried. He looked away and rocked back and forth.
I placed my hand on the cold cement under me. It was slippery and all from the water. All that water was flowing down the wall we were leaning up against. There was no sanctuary for the weak and honestly, we were the weakest.
His momentum began to rock him forward. I thought he wanted to go for a ride, so I pushed him softly to the side. “MHMM!” he moaned at me but didn’t look. He slid forward though. I could be rough sometimes, no kidding.
He slid a little further and what you ought to know is that we were basically on a cliff. If you slide, you keep going. He kept going. He let his feet slide and his body carry him along. I watched it. It was quite funny if I am being honest.
This was disregarding the fact that I had forgotten that good ole’ Jasper couldn’t swim. So, I watched as he slid into the pool of water. Jasper didn’t do anything though, he just slid into the water and let his body go. Go into the depths of cold.
I laughed for a moment. Sometimes you just have to. Then, it clicked. I stood up. Quick, quick, quick!
I jumped and threw myself down, sliding into the water and going in. It pierced me as the cold drove spikes into my sides. I couldn’t see him. It was deep and the water was black. Dang skater kids always painted the floor.
Feet kicking, hand groping, body freezing. I kicked him. I kicked him, dang it. My arm went further and I submerged my body. COLD!
I lifted him. His body was freezing. He wasn’t shivering though. I grabbed him tightly. I couldn’t let him die. Old Jasper couldn’t die. I lived for him. I pulled him out and sat him down, not letting him fall back in. His eyes were closed. His body was still freezing.
I checked his pulse.
Nothing.
“Come on, Jasp!” I said, shaking his body. I didn’t cry through. I couldn’t cry. Old Jasper didn’t deserve my tears.
He didn’t reply. He was gone. Dead. I was sure of it. The cold had killed him.
I let him go. His body faded back into the water.
“The docks… Go find yer ma’ at them docks, Jasp.”
Then I walked away, freezing.
Not crying, but depressed? Yes.