The night was cloaked in black, only interrupted by the beams of light that shone on the cobblestone streets. As curfew silenced all but those who walked the wretched, bloody streets, sent by the great houses to kill and speak. But there is a man who tried to break free, devoted to finding an end to the wretched ways his mind had been twisted into. A man who was beaten into submission as a child, to stay away from hopes and dreams, that had made that little boy into the devil’s crooked smile. He was a tool forged from evil.

Fear! Fear! Fear the plight
Its heartless soul stalks the night
Shadows trace Its every waking move
What wretched creature had god brought
For the eyes of the moon

A Black Black cloak that billows in the wind
The souls that courted death caught within
A soft quiet tune of blade and gun
That could never reap the sins
That had been shunned

If not blinded by rage
He would see
A world plagued of
Dust and debris
Of lives lost
And bloodshed
Drowning in his
Own head

Many never knew my pain. It stemmed from the bloodthirsty men who had raped my sanity. These men who took me by the legs and dragged me to the room. They shouted and cursed god’s name as they whipped me with their words, letting the blood of my tears flow as I hung on my own regret. The regret of believing in such dreams and hopes of wanting to be free. My parents knew what would happen when they sold me off when I was just three. I wish I hadn’t remembered their forsaken faces. I wish I hadn’t learned how to handle a blade with such precision that it could enter the heart that blessed me with life.

Watch his eyes bear the pain
Of a thousand voices
That call his name
A mountain of guilt
Caught under a pile of shame

Seduced by thoughts
That question his life
Choking on the ever-growing strife
Shoved under, yet still trying to breath
Fighting with double sided blade
His heart the sheath

Yet he still smiles
His words that flow
As smooth as a river
To and fro
As if in the bittersweet name
He could live
And life willing
Ready to give

There were days I ran away from the hellish place just to be brought back and tortured to an extent many could not comprehend. Yet, one day they gave me a puppy that was so adorable, with golden hair that ran the whole of its body and little black eyes that stared at me with such intensity it was almost as if there was some instant mutual connection between us. I took care of it, fed it, and watched it grow for months, and in return, it tailed me everywhere I went and nobody stopped it. Of course, until they handed me a gun with silver steel that laced around the holt, glinting in the soft streams of moonlight that filtered through the half-closed drapes. They told me there was one bullet inside. For me or the dog.

I felt it tunnel
As a snake through my gut
A black solemn seed that grew
Like a tree
Branching its way
Breaking free
Of holds
With bounds
Never known

They knew they had broken me the moment my scream had left the room. They stood and watched as I bought the bloodied body of the dog with its little black eyes still open staring as if into some other realm, lifeless. Their placid stone faces betrayed no emotion as they watched me stumble out of the room and to the outdoors. Rain pattered on those cobblestone streets as I clawed at the front lawn soil sobbing trying to dig a grave.

Quiet wind
Quiet sky
The pale moon shines
On those
Who lie

They told me to go and kill a man many years later as the dark thing that dwelled in my gut, the little monster had begun to slowly become me. I walked the streets with my black cloak that billowed in the wind. With my wrist, I softly flicked the dagger covered by the rims of my sleeve into the palm of my hand as I neared the little house. It was a plain house on the other side of the town bordering the forest to its right. Smoke fell out of the chimney in little stacks dissipating in the light breeze. My gaze fell upon the porch where an old man sat rocking back and forth on a little wooden rocking chair. My breath caught in my mouth as I stared in shock at the old man I was sent to kill. Musty peppered gray hair covered his dulled blue eyes with a face that was ever so recognizable. My dad’s head turned and caught my eyes and a tired knowing smile began to form on his face. In that second I saw the puppy stare back at me curiously right before the gunshot. I blinked away a tear and continued to walk. Every step hurt in agony as I slowly made my way up to my father and stopped. He closed his eyes in resignation and waited. My arm tensed but I couldn’t bring myself to kill him. In that fleeting moment I was an innocent child again, and he my young father. A memory hardened and worn by many years flashed before my eyes. My father was younger then, he had shoved me into the hands of another man accompanied by words that had been whispered inaudibly. Money flashed from hand to hand. Next came the torture. I was just a little kid I had never wanted any part of this. “You let them take me” I whispered softly and plunged the silver dagger into his heart. Then I broke.

We are the broken men
Who walk the night
Our souls lost
In an endless fight